


After the Visit

by GretchenSinister



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Gen, I don't care for that at all, both Bunnymunds are here actually, fyi book Bunnymund is straight up an ancient alien with all the attendant issues in that concept, jackrabbit-flavored gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-02 08:53:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19195654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GretchenSinister/pseuds/GretchenSinister
Summary: Original Prompt: "They are so different I can’t imagine it, haha, so I’d like to see sexy Aussie Bunny being the apprentice and eventual replacement of the first, timelord/jedi master/egg and chocolate loving book Bunnymund."Jack visits Bunny in the Warren shortly after Bunnymund has been there, Sandy is there to help Bunny recover, and also to score his rants.





	After the Visit

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Tumblr on 2/6/2016.

“Jack!” Bunny sounded pleased to see him, which wasn’t as unusual as it had been, but it was still pretty unusual for today because Bunny had told Jack  _specifically_  that he was going to be busy. Had he missed whatever it was that was making Bunny busy? Had he lost his chance to be a nuisance? Horrors! The crushing disappointment—or so he would say, if asked—caused him to fly lower than usual, and therefore turn more leaves on the treetops of the warren red and yellow than usual.  
  
But maybe he wouldn’t be asked. Bunny looked positively fond of him when he landed. The frankly bizarre glow of his expression—or so he would say, if asked—almost made him miss that Sandy was also there. Both of them were surrounded by a number of tiny mugs and pastel candy wrappers. “What’s up?” he asked. “Were you really, honestly, going to invite me to the sleepover, but the Man in the Moon said no?”  
  
To Jack’s astonishment, Bunny actually laughed. “ _No_ , Frostbite. I’m not having secret parties here. I really was busy today, until not very long ago. Sandy’s here to help me regain my normal unflappable calm. Yeah—and I know you’re going to ask, so, here. Might as well sit down.”  
  
“You didn’t even warn me about freezing the grass,” Jack couldn’t help but point out once he’d settled down. Sandy handed him a little mug, which turned out to be full of wonderfully fragrant hot chocolate.  
  
Bunny sighed. “It really doesn’t—it’ll grow back. Everything in the Warren grows back. That’s what it does. It’s  _Springtime_  and that’s what I—” He closed his eyes and Sandy patted him on the arm. “I don’t mean to sound annoyed at you, Jack, because this time, it’s so not you.”  
  
“Is it a weird Guardian thing?” Jack sipped his hot chocolate. It was amazingly good, too bad the cup was so small. He looked down and noted with some puzzlement that the mouth of the mug was egg-shaped instead of circular. “Nothing like talking about weird Guardian things, right Sandy?”  
  
Sandy just winked at him.  
  
“Yeah, I can bet,” Bunny said. “All right. So, this is kind of a weird Guardian thing, but maybe not how you’re expecting. I’m not the first Easter Bunny. Or—no, given the timing, I am the first  _Easter_  Bunny, but I’m not the first being that looks like a bunny to be a Guardian. The first one’s name is Bunnymund, and I was his apprentice before I was a Guardian, and he’s a pooka, but not like the pooka you’ve met in Ireland, he claims to be a space alien but Sandy says he’s full of crap, and…I don’t even know where to begin. The Man in the Moon chose him to be a Guardian, but—” Bunny shook his head. “I know I’ve given you crap about causing chaos and being dangerous, Jack, but at least you  _do_  care about kids. Bunnymund doesn’t like humans. At all. I mean, maybe a tiny amount. A few people. In abstract. If they acknowledge his superiority in chocolate making and that he’s the inventor of”—Bunny rolled his eyes—“trains, and chocolate, and tai chi, and humor, and life on Earth—”  
  
“What was that last one again?” Jack asked. “That’s a bit more than a weird Guardian thing.”  
  
“It would be if it was true,” Bunny said. He gave an exasperated sigh. “But none of it is. The Man in the Moon believes him, though, and he’s got this weird ancient artifact which, yes, is effective against Pitch. So that’s why he was a Guardian. But when the Man in the Moon started to get a clue that there’s a lot more to being a Guardian than stopping one specific villain—that we’re more, far more than warriors, that’s it’s usually not literally Pitch Black that kids are facing—well, then Bunnymund doesn’t seem to be the best choice. So to make a long story short Manny spins this idea that Bunnymund should be allowed more time for his research—he jumped at that—but there still needed to be a Guardian to take his place, so he chose me and changed me—I used to be human, don’t dwell on it, please—but I can’t ever tell Bunnymund that, he wouldn’t believe me anyway, but it’s weird, he expects me to know all this stuff about being a pooka, and when I don’t he gets all condescending about my “poor education,” Manny told him I was a foundling in the woods or something, and I’m supposed to be his apprentice, even if he doesn’t know a! Bloody! Thing! about Springtime or hope or actual children or anything but chocolate and eggs, chocolate and eggs, and those aren’t specifically related to anything about Easter except that they’re what Bunnymund thinks is important and if I don’t pay attention to those things, then Bunnymund will start to twig and Manny will insist on appeasing him and it’ll be more of a headache than anything,  _anything_  to do with Pitch, and, fine, this story’s not short at all, but the point is that today he came to visit to check up on me even though I’m not his apprentice anymore, and to impress me with the new chocolates he made, and all right, I love chocolate, and he is the best chocolatier out there, but I  _cannot_  praise anyone or anything as highly as Bunnymund wants to be praised, and after enough of that, I’m feeling like I’d rather put stale Halloween generics in Easter baskets rather than listen to him any longer.”  
  
Sandy held up a dreamsand “8.5” over his head, and Jack looked at him in puzzlement.  
  
“You give swearing too much weight in your scores,” Bunny said. He took a deep breath. “In conclusion, I know you think I have a stick up my ass, and that I didn’t have a clue about kids until you showed up, but that’s because you haven’t met Bunnymund. Who I probably—no, absolutely—have spent too much time around over the centuries. And to be honest I kind of wish you had showed up in full chaos mode while he was here, just to see the look on his face when I introduced you as the new Guardian.”  
  
Sandy shook his head emphatically and made a few more signs to Bunny.  
  
“Oh—yeah, he probably would want to interfere even more, then.” Bunny grimaced. “Anyway, good to have you here, Jack.”  
  
“Thanks, but—this is a lot to take in, you know. I mean, I—wait, you said you were glad to have me here! In so many words. That must be the most shocking thing of all!”  
  
“Aw, come on, just because I’m a little slow to warm up—” Bunny broke off and sighed.  
  
“Do you really, really not want me to make a pun about that?” Jack asked, trying to sound as if he would be heartbroken if Bunny said no.  
  
“I—nah, it’s all right,” Bunny said. “It’ll be closer to humor than anything Bunnymund ever came up with.”  
  
Sandy ranks this interaction a 5.3, though neither Bunny nor Jack is clear on what would be a 10.0.  
  
Or so they would say, if asked. 


End file.
